I Can’t Stop Worrying!
Our minds likely evolved to help us survive. It was adaptive for our ancestors to worry about the future and anticipate where danger might be lurking. Those who sat around without a care in the world were the type that got killed. So essentially, we’re the offspring of our most neurotic ancestors. That helps explain why our minds are such unruly organs! Now worry isn’t necessarily a bad thing; it can motivate us to take action in order to avoid potential pitfalls. But when it becomes pervasive it can take us out of the present moment. So what do we do?
Drop Anchor
Worried thoughts have an amazing ability to monopolize our attention. When a storm of worried thoughts whips through, we end up completely engulfed. We can’t control the weather, but what we can do is drop an anchor to ground ourselves amidst the storm. We can anchor our attention to the sights, sounds, and smells that are right here in order to pull us back into the refuge of the present moment. You can find Dropping Anchor exercises by Russ Harris in a variety of lengths here.
Worry Time
This technique has been shown to reduce the amount of time you worry about things you can’t control. In order to do it, you designate a consistent time of day and place in your home where you will worry for 15 min (no more than 30 min). Don’t choose a location that you use for relaxation, like your couch or bed - we don’t want your mind to associate those locations with worry. Set a timer and allow yourself to worry. Give those worries your full energy, effort, and attention. If it’s possible to solve the problem at hand, then solve it. If it’s not possible, then work on accepting the situation for now. Once the timer goes off, get up and return to your day. Repeat daily as long as needed. If worries enter your mind later on then acknowledge them, maybe even write them down if they’re new, and then return your attention to whatever you’re doing in the present moment. Knowing that you’ve got time set aside tomorrow to attend to these worries will make it easier to refocus.
Feel Your Feelings
We experience emotions as physical sensations in the body e.g. tension, pressure, tingling, heat, etc. Often, worry is the mind’s way of trying to distract from or solve the discomfort we’re feeling in our bodies. It’s as if our mind thinks, “If I can come up with a solution then I won’t have to feel this!” With practice, we can learn to drop the struggle with our emotions. We can practice simply observing the physical sensations in our body. When we do, we tend to find that emotions are easier to bear, we learn that they come and go, and as a result our mind is less inclined to spiral. Pretend you're a curious investigator who has never encountered this emotion before. Simply notice, what sensations are present in the body? Observe how these sensations change moment to moment. This takes some practice, so I suggest starting with a mild emotion and working your way up to the tougher ones. This Mindfulness of Emotion meditation from Insight Timer can be a helpful guide.
