Got Procrastination?
Procrastination is often framed as a lack of willpower. Western society loves to spout the virtues of self-discipline and chastise those who “fail” at it. In actuality, procrastination is usually more of an emotional distress problem.
Let’s see if this is the case for you too. Bring to mind something important that you’ve been avoiding, maybe it’s going to the gym, doing that project at work, calling your mother, etc. Once you’ve identified something, close your eyes, imagine performing that task, and notice what shows up.
Seriously. Stop reading and give it a try. I’ll wait.
Did you do it? What did you notice?
Procrastination: A Mind/Body Connection
Often, people will notice uncomfortable emotions or physical sensations in their bodies. There is mind/body connection so there are likely to be some predictions attached to these feelings. What is the story your mind is telling you about what will happen when you start this task? My mind likes to tell me all sorts of things, “I don’t know how to do this! I’ll look foolish! It’ll be awful! It’ll drain me! I can’t deal with this right now!” As humans, we instinctively avoid discomfort - it’s a survival mechanism. So when these painful thoughts and feelings show up we’re usually quick to decide “I’ll deal with this task later” in order to get a little relief.
In fact, you might also notice your mind offering some mental rules about how to best accomplish this task. “I should wait until I feel more motivated or more energetic. I should do it next week when things are less hectic.” Unfortunately, once established - mental rules like these are really resistant to change. We keep following these rules because they promise to make the task easier and following rules feels good, but our direct experience tells us that it’s been weeks and we’re not actually getting more motivation, energy, or ease. Don’t get me wrong! Mind’s are amazing tools! But at the end of the day we’ve got to check in with our direct experience too. What if it’s the case that any time you go to do this task, these difficult thoughts and feelings will show up?
How to Overcome Mental Blocks
It’s like you’re trying to get somewhere important but everytime you set out - dark, foreboding, low hanging clouds gather in the sky just above you. They’re scary looking, so you turn back and wait for better weather. You try again… and again… and again, but each time those clouds show up. What do you do? Well you can’t control the weather, but you could learn to step back and just watch the clouds as they ebb and flow. You’d begin to feel some separation from those clouds, notice that they’re impermanent, and that they aren’t harming you in any way. It might begin to feel possible to set out towards what matters most and let those clouds be until the weather eventually shifts.
If you want to learn to step back and witness thoughts and feelings in this way I suggest trying this exercise from Insight Timer. It can help you get a little distance from these internal experiences so they don’t have so much influence over your behavior. These skills can take some practice and coaching so give it a try and bring your challenges into session so we can work on them together!
